Books that had me saying “WTF!”

Yep! That’s right Booklovers, today is a day for ranting, and it’s obvious from the title what I’m ranting about…books that had me like “wtf!” Books that I disliked so much I wanted to blaspheme against the book gods and throw them into a murky fast flowing river just so I never had to see them again! Am I being a bit extreme? Am I over exaggerating? Maybe just a little.

Disclaimer

This is in no way a personal attack to the authors/ readers of these books, and if you read any one of these and enjoyed/loved them it is in no way a personal attack on you. This is just my opinion! Also I should mention this will undoubtedly involve spoilers as I delve into why I didn’t like these books, so be warned!

  1. Furyborn by Claire Legrand

I received an ARC of this book, and was so hyped at the time. The premise sounded great, and I was really keen to see how it would tackle the huge time jump (1000 years I think it spans). I was also really keen to see this so-called ‘bisexual representation’ that I was told would be in there…yeah, that was a disappointment!

This book was meant to give me action, strong heroines, and a new world to explore. What did it actually give me? Two lusty females, neither of whom actually did much throughout, and literally no bisexual rep at all! It was such a let down! Looking back on it I honestly don’t know how I managed to get through it. Also – sidenote – one of the female protagonists literally felt like a under developed Celaena Sardothien; a cheap and terrible immitation which I was so not on board for!

The only thing that I did like about this book was the use of magic in the first chapter…that was it! All down hill from there. Sorry not sorry.

2. Fifty Shades of Grey by E L James

Firstly, I never and I repeat never read these kinds of books (not that there is anything wrong with books in this genre, it just isn’t my thing typically). The reason, you may ask, for deciding to pick it up then? Friends, and hype. Simple as that. I heard from so many friends around the time of release that it was a great book, and I should read it ASAP. Actually, I didn’t even buy a copy, my friend pushed hers under my nose, and demanded I read it.

I don’t think I’m the only one out there who thinks “WTF!!” when encountering this book. I get there may be appeal to BDSM, sure, that’s fine, but what I don’t (and probably will never) get is the appeal to a guy who is controlling af! Excuse me if I’m missing something, please enlighten me? I get he is ‘damaged’ and has a ‘bad past’, but what right does that give him to treat her that way? Why are we making excuses for someone who is that controlling? I’m sorry, but on that basis alone I could never get behind these books. I just can’t! Maybe I’m just too strong willed, but I don’t personally think so. I think many woman on here will agree that being treating in such a manner is not a turn on. Just saying.

3. Everless by Sara Holland

I literally think I am one of the only people who doesn’t like this book! Everyone else I know gives it such good praise and hype, and I’m over here glaring like “What am I not seeing/ reading here?” Again, the premise for this book sounded great! I mean using time as currency etc, sounded cool af, and I was so ready for this book. However, I was so upset when I actually read it. It was so boring! It was so predictable! The romance? WTF?! Really, wtf was that romance? She had been pining over a guy since she was young even though her facts were all muddled, and the guy who had been there all along (as the enemy…eyeroll) was the one who she should have really been thanking etc. Yawn, bloody Yawn! I found the protagonist useless, and stupid, and if there is one thing in a book I cannot stand, it is a useless main character.

So no people, I did not pick the second book up, and neither shall I!

4. Twilight by Stephenie Meyer

I’ll admit when I was young and in high school I did read this whole series, but to be honest couldn’t really remember much so decided to pick it up again a couple of years ago…big mistake! The first thing I have to say about this book (because I can’t really remember the others) is that I’m shocked it managed to make it to print. No, not because of the concept, but because it looks as though it hasn’t seen a damn editor!! Obviously, when I was younger I didn’t take note of the writing, but goodness me this time it stuck out like a sore thumb.

Now, again, I’m not bashing authors here, this was a debut, and she should have had a team to help her out with the errors, but it definitely meant that I couldn’t get into the story.

The story itself was average, although I have a few issues there too, like the weird, and quite frankly creepy, notion that Bella is ‘like a drug’…bit weird. I’m not generally a fan of relationships that are so imbalanced, which to me…this one is.

5. Damsel by Elana K Arnold

I picked this book up because it has dragons. Don’t judge me, I’m dragon mad! I didn’t really know much going into it, all I needed to hear was dragons, and it was pretty much a done deal I was going to read it.

It didn’t take me long to realise that this was not a book for me…at all! Having read a lot of fantasy there seemed to be this forced effort to make the characters sound a certain way; I don’t know how to explain, but when you read George R R Martin there is a way in which he uses language to give you such a strong insight into his characters, and I felt from chapter one that this is what the author was trying to do with the prince, but for me it just felt forced. You are given this whole “I need to rescue the damsel to earn my throne” objective for the prince, and that is where the story starts. He rescues her, he acts like she is his ‘destiny’ etc, and then out of nowhere…literally nowhere, he becomes this whole other monster.

I really didn’t know how to react at all. Also – side note – what is with this whole ‘to be a bad guy I must be a sex pest and rapey asshole’? What is with that? Help a girl out here, because is it just me, or are there other ways to show a guy as being an asshole…eyeroll to this damned trope!! Now, here’s what really had me throwing the book (I am unfortunately being completely serious…I threw the book!) The prince gets the damsel back to his palace, and during the night slips into her room, and tries to force himself on her. Which believe it or not isn’t the worst part…the following day he apologises to her, but then says “But who can blame me, when a beauty such as yourself is under my roof, and so close to being my wife?” WTF!!! Dude I can blame you! Also just so you all know – the marriage in no way is her choice! She is told she is to marry him. Can you see why this is on my WTF list?

There you have it! My rant about books that had me saying ‘wtf?’ Thank you if you managed to stick with me through that lol! Are there any books you think should make the list? Let me know in the comments. 

Five Friday Faves!

I’m so excited to begin doing these posts! Friday faves is something I adore throughout the community, and wanted to participate in, so every Friday I will be posting my 5 faves – whether that be worlds, magic systems, main characters, couples etc.

In the theme of Valentines day (which, I know, I know…was yesterday) I thought I’d do my 5 fave couples in books!

This is a difficult one for me, as there are obvious choices that come to mind – such as certain characters from the classics etc, but to keep this from becoming too saturated with the ‘typical classic couples’ we all love and know, I decided to go for a list focusing on the fantasy genre in general.

This list is not in any particular order, I’m not rating one above the other particularly, I’m just giving you the generalized list of faves!

  • Serene and Raoden from Elantris – This is a couple I encountered recently, but I just adore! They are so perfect for each other, so strong willed and willing to do what it takes to achieve peace for their people! They are an awesome power couple.
  • Elide and Lorcan from the Throne of Glass Series – If you follow me on bookstagram, you will know how much I’ve previously gone on about this couple. I adore them so much, I have a weird love for brooding male types, and I just melt at this quiet yet strong woman managing to warm the heart of this immortal stern-faced male.
  • Mia Corvere and Ashlinn Jarnheim from The Nevernight Chronicle – Spoiler Alert (Sort of) – Scroll down if you have not read Nevernight or Godsgrave!! You’ve been warned! Okay so at first I struggled with this because, you know…forgiving Ashlinn, but now I’m totally on board with this power couple!
  • Patch and Nora from the Hush Hush Series – I can’t help it, I just have a thing for guys who are all dark and mysterious!! I’m not the only one!
  • Jon Snow and Ygritte from A Song of Ice and Fire – I adored this couple so much (weeps uncontrollably) Damn you George R. R. Martin! Ygritte was so good for Jon!

There you have it, my Five Friday Fave Couples! I probably have forgotten some if i’m honest, so please feel free to hit me up in the comments with those you would have added to your list, or ones that you would swap out from mine. Who is your fave couple from books?

Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson Review

Hey Booklovers! Happy Valentines Day!! Since today is a day to spread some love I wanted to review a book I recently fell head over heels for, and the book of honour today is…Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson! 

  • Title: Warbreaker
  • Author: Brandon Sanderson
  • Paperback: 672 pages
  • Publisher: Gollancz (29 Dec. 2011)
  • Genre: Fantasy
  • ISBN-10: 9780575097469
  • ISBN-13: 978-0575097469
  • My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Synopsis

WARBREAKER is the story of two sisters – who happen to be princesses, the God King one of them has to marry, a lesser god, and an immortal trying to undo the mistakes he made hundreds of years ago.

Theirs is a world in which those who die in glory return as gods to live confined to a pantheon in Hallandren’s capital city. A world transformed by BioChromatic magic, a power based on an essence known as breath. Using magic is arduous: breath can only be collected one unit at a time from individual people.

But the rewards are great: by using breath and drawing upon the color in everyday objects, all manner of miracles and mischief can be performed.

My Review

Trying to put this book into words literally leaves me like “blahgergerangahallafle!!” I really don’t know how to begin gushing over this book with you all! Perhaps a fair assessment would be to say that since I gave it 5 stars I must have liked it! Well, I do, I love it! It was so much fun! So many unexpected moments occured, and there were so many vibrant characters worth falling in love with!

Another easy assessment would be to say that given this book was 672 pages long, and I managed to finish it in less than 8hrs – something must have kept me turning those pages. Yes! This book though chunky by some peoples standards was fast paced and full of “what will happen next?” moments! I literally didn’t want to put it down.

I went into this book not knowing much (that’s generally how I like to go into books these days) and I really enjoyed watching the plot unfold. The story follows two princess sisters Siri and Vivenna; the former considered an unimportant daughter of a king, and the latter has been raised to know that she will someday marry the brutal God King Susebron. Last minute plans change, and Siri who has forever believed herself to be unimportant is now tasked with marrying the God King and bearing him a child, whilst her sister is to stay safe within her kingdom.

This doesn’t go to plan…obviously, and Vivenna decides to take actions into her own hands to recover her sister from this monstrous man, but all is not as it seems, and during this book the previous roles of the sisters seem to change forever.

I loved the characters so much, each was so well constructed. Siri is so wild and unapologetically herself that I couldn’t help but love her early on, and don’t get me started on Lightsong; he is hilarious, and amazing, and gosh I love him!! Susebron was not at all how I was expecting him to be! Vivenna had an amazing arc, and I really rooted for her, Vasher was one who crept up on me, and took my breath away!

Honestly I don’t want to ruin this experience for anyone who hasn’t read it yet, but damn I’m so happy I read this book, and am trying hard not to leak the spoilers!

Overall, this book was fantastic! Definitely recommend it to everyone who is a fan of fantasy…and maybe even if you aren’t! I adored this. So much of this book wasn’t what I thought it would be. I made my assumptions, and was shocked to realise they were all wrong. Warbreaker is truly a great book; one of my faves this year so far. Confessedly becoming a Sanderson Fangirl over here!

Reading Update #2

Another week, another reading update! It’s time for me to update all you book-lovers on how I am getting on with my TBR goals!

Keeping in mind my monthly TBR, I think I am doing fairly well for a change. Normally I completely go off on my own tangent, and barely read any of my planned monthly reads. This month…I’ve smash it!

Books I’ve managed to finish from my TBR

As you know from last weeks reading update I have already finished Assassin’s Apprentice by Robin Hobb, but since I last updated you all I have managed to read Elantris by Brandon Sanderson, Master of Sorrows by Justin Call, China Rich Girlfriend by Kevin Kwan, Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski, and Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson – which I will be posting a review for tomorrow (So stay tuned for that!).

Not on the TBR books I’ve finished

Today, as I am posting this I realise that I have completed my monthly TBR [gasps in shock!]. I have also managed to read In an Absent Dream by Seanan McGuire which is the fourth installment of novellas in the Wayward Children series. I love this series and since it’s so small couldn’t resist reading it!

What I’m planning to read next?

Since I don’t have anymore ‘structured reads’ this month I wanted to go onto some books that are sitting on my shelf and need some attention. I plan on reading Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor – which is a long overdue read! Also, I want to get around to The Binding by Bridget Collins, because I am super keen to devour this book.

Random Tidbits

I was planning on posting my review for Master of Sorrows tomorrow, but instead decided that I would post my review of Warbreaker. This is due to Master of Sorrows release date being next week, and I thought as tribute to its launch I would upload my review on the 21st Feb when the rest of the bookish community can finally get their hands on this fabulous book!

How are you getting on with your reading goals this week? Have you gone off script? Or are you being more diligent? Let me know in the comments below.

Deck of Cards Book Tag

Again, another book tag! I was tagged on Instagram, but like last time I just like posting them here in the hopes that you can all join in!

  • Poker (most anticipated read): The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon! I am so so excited for it. I love dragons so much, and its’ such a beast of a book! 800+ pages! I’m giddy!
  • War (action-packed): A Song of Ice and Fire Series by George R. R. Martin! and Godsgrave by Jay Kristoff.
  • Go Fish (light and fun): Little White Lies by Jennifer Lynn Barnes, or Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan.
  • Blackjack (current read): I’ve just finished Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson, like literally finished it this morning, so haven’t picked anything else up yet
  • Solitaire (next read): Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski. It’s  part of the read-a-long I’m participating in.
  • Gin (mind-blowing read):A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin – I was shook reading that book, I adored it so much! And The Wicked King by Holly Black – that ending!!

Let me know your answers in the comments. I’d love to know what you think. 

Shelf Guilt

I thought today I would take time to talk about a real issue in the bookish community…Shelf Guilt!! Yes, that’s right, that horrible feeling when you glance appreciatively at your shelves and realise there is more unread books than there is read.

When you look at the handful of books that have been anxiously waiting for attention for the last six months, but your phone pings with an email to tell you that your book order should arrive soon.

Let’s be real here, if you haven’t got this issue then are you even a book hoarder? Seriously if you don’t suffer from this issue please tell me what magic you are using, lend a girl a spell, because I am straight up terrible for this. My shelves hate me! I feel the heavy and judging stares of each unread book on a daily basis, and every day I tell myself “No Steff! No more book buying!”. I’ll drop the BS and let you know here and now that this mantra doesn’t work at this point…(loud sigh of resignation).

So, today I am posting this with resignation. I’m posting in the hopes that you, fellow book-lovers, will have methods of dealing with this; ones that are better than mine, but ultimately I’m here to tell you it’s alright. Despite the guilt it is okay to buy too many books, but if like me you feel that something has to be done about it below are some recommendations to help you out.

  • TBR Jar – When you fold up pieces of paper with the name of each book you need to read, and place them in a jar. Draw out one at a time, or perhaps a handful and make that your next read/ tbr for the month.
  • Starting Buddy Reads or a Readalong – When you recruit friends who have the same book as you and and read it over a set period of time. This can be done on Goodreads, or any social media platform if you don’t have anyone close to you who actually reads. Alternatively you could join a group that is already hosting a readalong/ buddy read.
  • Make a Monthly TBR – Looking at your shelves, and prioritizing what you want to read more urgently. Do you have an ARC you need to review? Prioritize it! Do you have a book that has a sequel coming out next month? Prioritize that! Is there a book the community has blown up over and you still haven’t gotten to it? Add it! Make a list (Vary it in size depending on your reading goals) and try oh try to stick to that list. Then repeat.
  • A Mood Reader Trove – Are you a mood reader? Can’t deal with a structured TBR? Then listen up. Dedicate a space (a shelf, a basket, a pile…whatever it is) and fill it with multiple genres from your unread books. Some contemporary, some fantasy, romance, thriller, horror whatever you like. When you feel particularly in the mood for something go there first, and see if there is anything that can satisfy your needs.

I know this sounds a lot easier than it actually is for some, and so please feel free to leave your recommended coping methods below. I’d love to hear your ideas.

Assassin’s Apprentice by Robin Hobb Review


Hello Booklovers! Time to review the beauty that is Robin Hobb’s Assassin’s Apprentice, as I mentioned on my tbr this is the first of many that I am trying to read this year by Robin Hobb (The plan is to read as much of her work in this world as I can).

Without further delay, let’s get to the review!

  • Title: Assassin’s Apprentice
  • Author: Robin Hobb
  • Paperback: 400 pages
  • Publisher: HarperVoyager (27 Mar. 2014)
  • Genre: Fantasy/ Epic Fantasy
  • ISBN-10: 000756225X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0007562251
  • My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟. 5

Synopsis 

The kingdom of the Six Duchies is on the brink of civil war when news breaks that the crown prince has fathered a bastard son and is shamed into abdication. The child’s name is Fitz, and he is despised.

Raised in the castle stables, only the company of the king’s fool, the ragged children of the lower city and his unusual affinity with animals provide Fitz with any comfort.

To be useful to the crown, Fitz is trained as an assassin; and to use the traditional magic of the farseer family. But his tutor, allied to another political faction, is determined to discredit, even kill him. Fitz must survive: for he may be destined to save the kingdom.

My review 

☆ This is a non-spoiler review ☆

This story was slow to start, I have to admit, but that did not hinder my overall enjoyment, which is why I still rated it highly.
We follow Fitz through his many trials and tribulations as he tries to navigate life as the bastard born son of the crown prince, getting himself into some sticky situations here and there as can be imagined.

The first real thing I have to say about this book is that the writing was great. Robin Hobb really is a great writer. One who gives us simplicity and style, and doesn’t comprise on character development. I thoroughly enjoyed her world, and characters. There was plenty of action, and intrigue to keep me on the edge of my seat. There was beautifully constructed twists and turns that I personally just didn’t see coming (at least not all of them). You quickly start to cheer on Fitz, hoping he will prevail through all, and your heart is clenching during the time of tension and turmoil in this book. I honestly really enjoyed this book. As I said, it is a bit of a slow burner and that trait alone, I know, isn’t for everyone….but once you’re in there, the story unfolds and takes hold of you.

I can’t wait to read the next installment in this trilogy! Definitely recommend to those who love fantasy and intrigue.